Tuesday

I needed some head space today. Some time away from the chaos. I volunteered, or rather insisted, that I did the run to the supermarket and went to see my friends at The Home on the way.

They don’t think it’s the slightest bit odd that I still go back even though both Mum and Lesley’s dad have gone. In fact I think they like it. And I know I’m not the only relative of a former resident who goes back from time to time.

The first person I saw was The Manager.

“Nick! Your Ladies will be so pleased to see you! How is Lesley doing?”

Since she’d asked, I told her. Everything. The whole sorry story. Why it had had to happen that way and how badly it was going.

“Your job now is to look after Lesley.”

I found Juliette in the lounge searching on YouTube for some music compilations for the residents there. She asked how we were doing and I told her the same story. She was sad but not surprised.

In fact everybody I met asked. And they all got told.

“Oh well. You can choose your friends but you can’t choose your family. I’ve got a sister that I’d quite happily never speak to again too.” one of them said.

I headed upstairs. Annie was in the lounge fast asleep. Eleanor was in the chair that Audrey usually sat in with one of her soft toys in the chair next to her where I used to sit.

“I’m not sure how I’m going to get him home!” she said, looking at the toy.

“I’m not sure I’d bother today. It looks nice out but it’s freezing cold today. It’s due to be nice tomorrow though. I’d sit tight for a bit and try then if I were you.”

“Oh. Alright.”

I found Audrey in her room. In bed. Clearly not well but with it enough to know that I hadn’t been to visit for a while. Conversation was stilted and not helped by the blaring telly. She struggled with her vocabulary just as much as normal but it was hard not to notice how slurred her speech was. She tired quickly and i made my excuses and left her to sleep.

Eleanor was in the corridor now.

“I’m worried about my dad. I haven’t seen him all day. He should’ve been here by now.”

I looked at my watch and made sure she saw me do it.

“It’s a bit early for him isn’t it? He’ll still be at work. Come in the lounge and take a pew while you wait. I’m sure he’ll be here as quick as he can.”

With Eleanor settled again I made my way out before she found something else to worry about.

I got home in time to receive an update from Lesley about her sister’s latest Facetime with Dad. She’d been sitting by her phone at the appointed time and waited for the staff at What We Have to Refer To As The Hospital to connect her. After waiting for 40 minutes she called The Hospital to find out what was going on. It wasn’t clear whether the delay was down to a lack of staff or a lack of organisation – probably both, knowing them – but Dad promptly told her he was too tired to talk and that she should leave him alone and let him sleep.

She was shocked.

“Blimey! I bet that went down well.”

“It’s not the first time he’s done that apparently.”

Bloody hell.

Author’s Note

My Mum was in a nursing home in the Thames Valley for a year and a half until she passed away in December 2024. My Father-in-law went into the same home the following January. But Lesley’s sister didn’t approve and made the situation so awkward that he had to be moved. The image is not of the home itself. I used AI to generate an image of a typical modern nursing home. Names and locations have been changed or hidden to protect the identities of those involved. Which, for the new home, is probably just as well.