Tuesday

I think Mum had had a pretty decent day today. She was cheerful and chatty, bright and alert. She wasn’t entirely in the real world though. She told me that her Aunt Doris was in The Home.

“She’s down the end there somewhere.”

“That’s nice Mum. I’ll go and see her before I leave.”

“Will you? She’d like that.”

She spoke more clearly today than she’d done in a long time.

“My auntie didn’t come to see me on Thursday.”

“Don’t worry about it Mum. I’m sure she’s fine. I’ll give her a ring when I get home to make sure she’s alright.”

“Good.”

The corridor outside Mum’s room was as busy as it usually is and Mum was alert to every movement past her door.

“Who’s that?”

“It’s Al.”

“Oh.”

And then a couple of minutes later…

“Who’s that?”

“It’s Al again.”

“Oh.”

That happened a few times in quick succession.

“Who’s that?”

“It’s Al again.”

“He works too hard.”

“I know he does. They all do here.”

“You need to take him to one side. Have a word with him.”

She talked more and mentioned John. I assumed that was her uncle rather my dad. She’d probably only mentioned Dad once or twice in the year and a half since her strokes. Her memory of him is long gone now and it makes me wonder how she reconciles my existence when she doesn’t remember having had a husband.

And then…

“I wonder why Jean and her daughter haven’t been in?”

“Did they say they were coming Mum?”

“No.”

“Well it’s Tuesday today and the daughter will be at school. I expect they’ll be here at the weekend.”

“Yeah.”

It’s been a while since Jean’s been mentioned. I had no idea who she was then either.

Al joined us and told me how he’d had a long conversation with Mum while he fed her her lunch.

“I understood more today than I’ve ever done!”

They’d talked about the foods she liked and about the little girl who lived next-door but one and how Mum liked to play with her.

“Mum’s just told me you work too hard. She says I need to have a word with you!”

“Thank-you for your concern Iris but I’m fine.”

Al left us and Mum continued to talk until she began to run out of steam.

“Have you got any stories?”

“I have Mum! This one’s called The Swimming Lesson.”

 I’m not sure who these stories are written for but they’re simply and gently told and they’re ideal for Mum. Her memory is good enough to hold the story for the ten minutes it takes to read each one and they have an uplifting, if slightly saccharin to my taste, ending too. The same characters appear in many of them but each story is self-contained. They’re familiar enough for her not to have to struggle to remember who each individual is but she doesn’t need to know anything about what happened in a previous chapter to enjoy them. If you can remember other chapters then you’ll understand the arc of the book but it won’t hamper the enjoyment if you can’t. Even if I was to read one each visit Mum wouldn’t have to suffer a repeat within a month. I think I’ve just written the Amazon review there.

Mum listened intently.

“They’re good little stories these, aren’t they?”

“Yes. They are.”

Speaking of story arcs, it’s only as I write this that I notice Mum’s increasing anxiety during the visit. Mum doesn’t suffer the stereotypical “They’re stealing my stuff!” or “Where’s all my money!?” high anxiety that you may imagine from the elderly. In fact in all the hours and hours I’ve spent in Mum’s various homes I may have heard that sort of thing once.

Mum’s anxiety is normally much more low key. Getting the blame for doing or not doing something trivial, not having seen somebody or other or not being visited by anybody at all. But just as I was preparing to leave she started frantically rummaging around in her duvet.

“Where’s my dad!? I’ve lost dad! I can’t find him!!”

Bloody hell.

Author’s Note

My Mum is in a nursing home in a small village in the Thames Valley. The photo is not of the home. I used an AI image generator to give the reader some idea of the home she’s in.

All, some or maybe even none (you’ll never know!) of the names have been changed to protect privacy and hide real identities. If you think you recognise someone then let me know and I’ll edit the post or remove it entirely