Tuesday

With no visit necessary to The Home and no concern for how Mum was doing I thought that today was going to be more odd than it turned out. A nurse had warned me on Saturday night that there’d be a huge and difficult adjustment to make. Today wasn’t the day to make it. I just felt numb and tired.

We got an early warning that the gap left by my Mum is going to be filled by Lesley’s dad. His morning carer called to say that Dad had made more mistakes with his meds and sent a photo of the dosset box so we could try and work out what had gone from where.

When we totted up what was left it looked like he hadn’t over- or under-dosed. He just hadn’t taken meds from the right row. I think he’s still capable of knowing what day of the week it is so it was more likely that he hadn’t remembered to change to his reading glasses and couldn’t see which row he was taking from.

No harm done then. At least not this time anyway.

That was followed by a message on the extended family chat that Eldest Sister’s kids’ dog had had to be put to sleep this morning. It was nearly 16 and it was known that the end was close. It would’ve been nice for it not to have happened right now though.

Later on we heard from friends on the south coast. C had been on her way to hospital for a regular appointment and she’d had a TIA on the way there.

The day was rounded off by a conversation with Lesley’s sister about Dad. A conversation that I almost didn’t manage to stay out of. Lesley is at the end of her tether with him now but doesn’t feel she can move forward to the next level of care without her sister’s support. If Lesley doesn’t get that support it’s inevitable that she will get the blame when things that he doesn’t like get put in place. But her sister has a terrible handicap – she still believes Dad when he tells her he’s fine and she finds it all too easy to tell Lesley she should do more for him. There aren’t enough hours in the day to do more for him.

Apart from all that it was a calm day for me. A gentle walk with The Dog and a few hours sleep in the afternoon.

Author’s Note

My Mum is in a nursing home in a small village in the Thames Valley. The photo is not of the home. I used an AI image generator to give the reader some idea of the home she’s in.

All, some or maybe even none (you’ll never know!) of the names have been changed to protect privacy and hide real identities. If you think you recognise someone then let me know and I’ll edit the post or remove it entirely